I was sent a really funny URL by Riverdaughter! If you plug in a URL, it will bring up a copy of the page in one of several funny dialects. Well, I couldn’t resist. After all, here at the Pond humor is a greatly valued quality!!
So, I dialectized one of the Ol’ Curmudgeon’s Blogs – the one about How to Fry a Potato, Revised – into Swedish Chef dialect. Enjoy!!
Hoo tu fry a putetu – Refeesed
Oogoost 30t, 2007 by mtreeggsI hed a reeder send in a cumment. Um de hur de hur de hur. Fella’s veb neme-a is juhnpoolstefensun. He-a hes hees oovn fuud blug und is vell vurt zee reedeeng. Effter tryeeng hees methud I hefe-a cume-a up veet zee fullooeeng refeesiun, surt ooff a cumbu betveee my furst methud und hees. Um gesh dee bork, bork! Guud reeders ere-a a neeceness, und thees oone-a ves a reel jooel.
Thees veell geefe-a yuoor fuud Nezee feets. Um gesh dee bork, bork! Tuoogh. Zeey’re-a guud. Bork bork bork!
OoK, vhet us Emereecun types cell French Freees prubebly ceme-a frum Belgeeoom sumoohere-a in zee 18t centoory; geefe-a a teke-a a decede-a oor tvu. Iferybudy in zee vurld hes hed a fry, joost ebuoot. Um de hur de hur de hur. Must ooff zee oones yuoo get frum zee fest fuud jueents ere-a joost gruss. Um gesh dee bork, bork! Pruperly prepered, zeey a cooleenery deleeght. Um de hur de hur de hur.
Tu pruperly prepere-a zeese-a leettle-a deleeghts tekes a beet mure-a iffffurt thun is epperent oon zee soorffece-a. Su, get yuoor best cuukeeng cep oon und let’s gu get ‘im. Fur sterters, use-a guud grede-a putetues. Um gesh dee bork, bork! My sooggesshuns ere-a Idehus, Roossets, oor Yookun Gulds. Um gesh dee bork, bork! Vheck zeem up intu ¼” streeps. Um gesh dee bork, bork! Yuoo cun skeen zeem oor nut es yuoor teste-a deectetes. Um gesh dee bork, bork! I leeke-a zee skeens oon. Bork bork bork! Tredeeshun in thees cuoontry is peeled. Bork bork bork! Yuoo cun elsu meke-a zeem a beet theenner fur shuestreeng style-a, oor theecker fur “hume-a freees” style-a. Tu my teste-a theen is better thun theeck. Yuoor meeleege-a mey fery. Bork bork bork!
Oonce-a yuoo’fe-a gut zeem chupped up yuoo need tu mufe-a feurly qooeeckly oor ploonge-a zeem intu un ice-a bet. Putetues lefft ixpused tu eur detereeurete-a repeedly. Bork bork bork! Iff yuoo du zee ice-a veter suek, dry zeem vell oon a peper tooel joost beffure-a cuuleeng. Veter und hut ooeel is a nu guud cumbu.
Yuoo cun use-a a cest irun deep fryer oor un ilectreec skeellet. Um de hur de hur de hur. Zee ilectreec skeellet is a beet ieseeer tu cuntrul temperetoore-a. Iff yuoo use-a a fryer zeen use-a a zeermumeter. Hurty flurty schnipp schnipp! Temperetoore-a is creeticel. Poot inuoogh ooeel tu meke-a a deep fry pusseeble-a, boot leefe-a luts ooff ruum et zee tup, it veell fuem up vhee zee spoods ere-a edded. Bork bork bork! Noo – vhet keend ooff ooeel is up tu yuoo, yuoo joost need a smuke-a pueent less thun 400°. Peunoot ooeel is guud, oor uny oozeer testeless, heelthy ooeel. Noo iff yuoo ere-a reedy tu shuut zee fuud Nezee und vunt joost glureeuoos teste-a, use-a lerd oor beeff fet, vheech ves vhet ves ooreeginelly used. Bork bork bork! Zeese-a veell be-a zee must vunderffool teste-a thet yuoo ifer hed. Bork bork bork! Yuoor chulesterul duesn’t gu up qooeete-a es fer es yuoo mey theenk iff yuoo cuuk zeem reeght. Um de hur de hur de hur.
Noo get thet ooeel tu a steedy 240° und iese-a smell betches in. Bork bork bork! Dun’t lued su mooch thet zeey steeck tugezeer oor looer zee temperetoore-a ooff zee ooeel. Mufe-a zeem eruoond ifery noo und zeen su zeey dun’t steeck tugezeer. Hurty flurty schnipp schnipp! Nefer meend zee teeme-a, joost fry unteel zeey fluet und zeen pooll zeem oooot – joost meke-a soore-a zeey dun’t broon. Bork bork bork! Vhee zeey fluet zeey shuoold steell be-a vheete-a und hefe-a guttee neece-a und leemp. Vhet ve-a ere-a dueeng is joost bueeling zee veter oooot ooff zee innerds veethuoot cuukeeng zee ooooterds. Um gesh dee bork, bork! Iff zee ooootseede-a gets brooned ve-a cunnut mufe-a uny mure-a veter oooot ooff zee inseede-a und it veell get suggy. Bork bork bork! Pooll zeem oooot veet a slutted spuun oor keetchee speeder und ley zeem oon peper tooels oor peper secks oor a reck tu dreeen. Bork bork bork! Du thees 10 meenootes tu 2 huoors eheed ooff teeme-a.
Vhee yuoo ere-a reedy tu feenish, jeck zee temp up tu 350°. Oonce-a egeeen cuuk in smell betches. Um gesh dee bork, bork! Thees teeme-a yuoo ere-a eeeming fur a guldee broon. Bork bork bork! Edd selt, pepper, deell, oor vhetefer speeces yuoo leeke-a zee secund yuoo teke-a zeem frum zee pun tu zee dreeening peper oor reck. Iff yuoo’fe-a dune-a iferytheeng reeght zeey veell be-a leeght, nun-greesy, creesp ooootseede-a und eury inseede-a veet a vunderffool teste-a.
A reelly guud gu-veet is tu melt a steeck ooff bootter, a cuoople-a ooff clufes ooff smeshed und chupped gerleec, veet vhetefer herbs yuoo leeke-a. Deell oor persley cumes tu meend. Bork bork bork! Joost cumbeene-a und heet unteel zee flefurs cume-a tugezeer. Hurty flurty schnipp schnipp! Dun’t fry zee stooffff. Unyvey, dreezzle-a thees oofer zee freees joost beffure-a serfeeng. Nu, it duesn’t meke-a zeem tuu greesy iff yuoo gut zeem cuuked reeght tu stert veet.
Now, wasn’t that fun!?! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!
